Originally, this feature's main articles were humorous exaggerations of actual toy-related stories (such as news of the He-Man and the Masters of the Universe series' release on DVD, reported as "Shocking He-Man Footage Made Public!"), and a sidebar column would appear somewhere within the "Monthly Rag" section with short summaries of the real news behind the exaggerated articles.
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An example would be "Ask Anakin Skywalker, Burning in Lava" (a reference to the character's horrific fate at the end of Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith); all of Skywalker's responses were non-sequiturs, primarily cries of pain and lamentations about his fall from grace.